Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Super Bowl Recap

This may be a little anti-climatic, as most fine readers of this blog, and league owners may have tapped out by now, but the inaguaral season of the Legion of Extraordinary Dorks is over! Our title game featured the vocal stylings of the Dirty Birds versus upstart Canadian Bacon. Looking to take down yet another juggernaut, Adam's team had already ripped through the #3 and #1 overall seeds, and with another upset, would become the most unlikely champion ever. I mean, after sneaking into the playoffs on a 5-7-1 record, Canadian Bacon suddenly caught fire and starting hosing their playoff competition.

Championship weekend, the Bacons came out strong with rookie QB Tim Tebow (22 pts) and a stiff Patriots Defense (21 pts). The problem was, their big play guy, RB Chris Johnson faltered to only five points. As Adam was going run-and-shoot, there was no other running threat to speak of. The only other top performer was TE Jason Witten, who continued to put up big points, eighteen total. With the Philadelphia - Minnesota game weather delayed till Tuesday, Canadian Bacon was behind the Dirty Birds by about twenty points and could catapault themselves to victory if WR DeSean Jackson had a huge game.

The problem was, the late season trade between Jon and Mike netted The Dirty Birds QB Michael Vick. If Jackson was going to have a good game, it would have to come through the powerful throwing arm of Vick. Long story short, a big upset didn't happen. Powered by Jamaal Charles (27), Jacob Tamme (20), and some solid numbers throughout the rest of his roster, Jon rolled to an easy Super Bowl victory. In the end, the score was 115 - 89, and that included a big fat zero by Birds' receiver Andre Johnson, who was pulled due to injury at the last minute.

In the Toilet Bowl, where a fat forty bucks was up for grabs, Andy and Ryan faced off for a bit of redemption cash. The odds were on Andy, who had the better team all year and fantasy MVP candidate Arian Foster. Foster had a great game, throwing twenty three points on the board, but a lack of overall depth sunk Andy's Six to Midnight. Marshawn Lynch, Kevin Walter, and Mercedes Lewis netted thirteen points total, which was the same as Neil Rackers, Andy's kicker. That's never a winning formula.

For Ryan's Snake Eyes team, Matt Forte threw up twenty six points and was complemented by Mario Manningham's twenty three through the air. Ryan didn't get outstanding performances from Peyton Manning, Ahmad Bradshaw, or Vincent Jackson, but there was enough al laround for a 108 - 80 Toilet Bowl victory.

Congratulations to Dirty Birds and Snake Eyes, champions of the League of Extraordinary Dorks!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Second Round Results & Matchups

#5 Team Johnson (107) vs #4 Team H (93)
Behind Darren McFadden's 41 points, Team Johnson pulled off a minor upset by toppling Team H, a slightly higher seed. QB David Garrard and RB Knowshon Moreno combined for 41 points to also lend a hand, but the rest of the team was actually quite weak. Still, the entire bench for Team Johnson scored in double digits so it'll just take a bit of lineup juggling to get the right mix in the next round versus Dirty Birds. Mark's team had Philip Rivers, Ray Rice, Vernon Davis, and Mike Wallace do well, but fell just a bit short, and nobody on the bench could have saved Team H from defeat.

#6 Canadian Bacon (120) vs #3 Inglorious Basterds (61)
Home field advantage, an overwhelming last few games, and a big trade last week couldn't prevent the Inglorious Basterds from suffering a huge round one defeat. Facing off against Canadian Bacon, the Basterds were poised to coast to victory. Instead, they stumbled -- as the new acquisitions totaled only 20 points, and Green-Ellis' was from the bench -- and ran into Adam's suddenly resurgent team. Canadian Bacon had scored only 62 and 54 points heading into the playoffs, but they exploded in this crucial matchup behind Chris Johnson (31 pt), DeSean Jackson (31 pts), and Jason Witten (25 pts). Can they topple another giant next week, the top ranked Fobulus?

Playoff Round 2 Matchups:
#1 Fobulus vs #6 Canadian Bacon
#2 Dirty Birds vs #5 Team Johnson




TOILET BOWL
There were no games of not in the Toilet Bowl, as each one was a massive blow out. The week featured a 131-39 drubbing of Gangsta Wangsta by Alberto's El Nino's. Or how about this exciting game: Six to Midnight scoring 63 points to Team Olivia's 27 points. Yawn. Let's hope the next round is better!

Toilet Bowl Matchups:
#7 Alberto's El Nino's vs #12 Snake Eyes
#8 Six to Midnight vs #10 Ro Bot.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

First Round Matchups

The regular season is over and we have our six playoff teams! Keep in mind the rules of our seeding, the payouts, the Toilet Bowl, and don't forget that home field advantage in the playoffs is worth +5 points. Let's get it on!



First round byes (divison winners):
#1 Fobulus (11-1-1)
#2 Dirty Birds (10-3)

Playoffs Round 1:
#3 Inglorious Basterds (9-4)
#4 Team H (8-5)
#5 Team Johnson (7-6)
#6 Canadian Bacon (5-7-1)

Matchups:
#3 Inglorious Basterds (9-4) vs #6 Canadian Bacon (5-7-1)
#4 Team H (8-5) vs #5 Team Johnson (7-6)


Toilet Bowl Round 1:
#7 Alberto's El Nino's (7-6)
#8 Six to Midnight (7-6)
#9 Antoine Dodson Hide Your Wife (5-8)
#10 Ro Bot. (5-8)
#11 Howler Monkeys (4-9)
#12 Snake Eyes (4-9)
#13 Team Olivia (4-9)
#14 Gangsta Wangsta (4-9)

Matchups:
#7 Alberto's El Nino's (7-6) vs #14 Gangsta Wangsta (4-9)
#8 Six to Midnight (7-6) vs #13 Team Olivia (4-9)
#9 Antoine Dodson Hide Your Wife (5-8) vs #12 Snake Eyes (4-9)
#10 Ro Bot. (5-8) vs #11 Howler Monkeys (4-9)

2010 Final Standings

A Big Deal

As the regular season winds down, a quiet in-season trading block has suddenly resulted in a blockbuster deal. The Dirty Birds, walking into a first round bye at 10-3, was looking for a premier quarterback to lead their playoff charge. With depth everywhere else, GM Jon decided to offer some of his high quality bench players in order to get an upgrade over Ben Roethlisberger and Matt Ryan. He started by offering every owner with a QB higher ranked than Ryan the following deal: Dwayne Bowe, Matt Ryan, BenJarvus Green-Ellis.

As the trade offers went out, Jon's division competitor, Mike of the Inglorious Basterds jumped on the offer. With a slightly sketchy third WR and second RB situation, the trade made sense for Mike as he needed to shore up a bit of depth before heading off into the post-season. Even though he'll be sad to part with Michael Vick in the deal, insiders report that the entire Basterds organization was excited for this influx of talent.

The two GMs have done business before, with a draft day trade of picks that resulted in Andre Johnson and Roddy White for Adrian Peterson and Greg Jennings. Intriguingly, that trade netted almost the exact same number of points for each team, with Johnson and White combining for 406 points while Peterson and Jennings combined for 398 points. That's about as dead even of a trade as you could have asked for.

Vick has been twenty two points better than Ryan this season (193 to 171), and is the fifth overall QB compared to Ryan at eighth. However, Vick has had fewer games to accomplish his totals and is undoubtedly more explosive. His recent weeks of 25-49-19-23-28 points dwarf Ryan's 13-24-20-11-12 over the same span.

The key to this deal was clearly WR Dwayne Bowe, who has been a revelation this season, and the number two receiver and the fourth overall including QB/RB/WRs. Before his curious donut last weekend, Bowe had been in double digits for seven straight weeks, with 43-28-48 points in WK10-12. And the last component of the deal, RB BenJarvus Green-Ellis, has proved to be starter quality also, as he's been at 15-16-17-20 points the past four weeks and was clearly sucking up space on Jon's bench. Now he'll be free to play next to Adrian Peterson on Mike's team.

The Birds have had 158-147-156 points in recent weeks but the Basterds hit their season high of 150 points during their last regular season game, and have had five 100+ games in a row. The two behemoths are set for a playoff showdown, and the winner of this trade won't be determined until we see how they perform during a Birds versus Basterds matchup.
  • For the season, the Birds have three of the top four players in Peyton Hillis, Roddy White, and Dwayne Bowe.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Bidding War

Brian Westbrook used to regularly be a top running back in fantasy. With his combination of running and receiving talents, Westbrook would lead the league in yards, often despite being injured for a few games each season. While never the consensus top back, Westbrook would always rank at least in the top five, and often as high as two. This past week, with Niner's RB Frank Gore going down, a bidding war broke out for Mr. Westbrook.

A lot of teams haven't used much of their FAAB budget and decided this could be their last chance to land an impact player. Oliver started the bidding at $13 but Ryan quickly doubled that to $29. Adam, fighting hard for a playoff spot in the Justice League, bid a whopping $61. Intriguingly, Andy, out of the playoff hunt, went even higher, to $71, as he prepares to win some Toilet Bowl money. For awhile, the dust had settled and it looked like Westbrook would be on Six to Midnight for the remainder of the season.

But at the last moment, Kevin jumped in with his entire FAAB budget, bidding $100 for Westbrook and shocking the crowd. Kevin's team, already the second highest scoring squad in the league, might have just shored up his backfield just in time for a deep playoff run. Congratulations on your fantasy football marriage Kevin and Brian!

While we're here, a quick look at the playoff hunt. Jon and Jimmy have locked up first round byes in their respective divisions, and it looks like Mike and Kevin are most assuredly in the playoffs too. With the top two division teams automatically in, we have two wild cards that are up for grabs. If Adam can win this week, he'll seal the second seed in the Justice League but if he loses and Oliver wins, Oliver will slide in there. The two wild cards are definitely coming from the Uncanny X-Men side, as there are two 7-5 teams and even a 6-6 team that already have better records than anyone beside Jimmy on the Justice League side.

In this season, it's clear that Marvel was way better than DC as the Uncanny X-Men has only one team that's not at least .500, and the Justice League only boasts one team with a winning record. Sorry Superman, your squad is weaaak.

Monday, October 18, 2010

The trade that meowed

In a minor deal, Snake Eyes trades WR Steve Breaston to the Dirty Birds in exchange for TE Brandon Pettigrew. Breaston was summarily released for Pettigrew's real life QB, Shaun Hill, who was then injured in Sunday's game. A trade of this minor proportion would normally be barely noted except both Ryan and Jon are convinced this move will secure their playoff berths.

They consider this trade a first date, like a coffee or a drink, and hope it will lead to bigger (trade) things in the future.